Maybe Not

"I'd take another chance, take a fall, take a shot for you
I need you like a heart needs a beat, it's nothing new
Yeah
I loved you with a fire red now it's turning blue
And you say
Sorry lord, the angel heaven let me think was you
But I'm afraid

It's too late to apologize"

Too late to apologize? No. Too late to try again or ever be given a second chance? Yes. But definitely never too late to apologize for wronging someone else; regardless of whether or not you have wronged yourself and the other person was a casualty in your own self destruction.

As per usual, as much as things change....they stay the same. Freud understood the human condition for self destruction in writing his Discontents; thankfully there is a major difference between understanding and acceptance. I understand but do not accept my fate of self destruction, although time and time again actions show that self destruction must be my only desire. Time heals ALL wounds and transgressions. Yours and Mine.

Different

I've come to realize that my blogs have no real direction per se. I usually blog when I feel like my head is going to explode with something. And today that something is Chrisette Michele. I'm sorry all true neo-soul fans out there but I getting reaquainted with the sound and have just fallen in love with this woman's voice. (kinda how Eric did for Ariel - Little Mermaid whaddup) But for real, her voice is melodic and enchanting I have been hitting the snooze button way to long on this one. Excuse me while I leave work....walk to Phenominal (which is the opposite direction from my house) to purchase this album

For Real

"Hell is empty, all the devils are here" - William Shakespeare

Enjoying It

Random Person: What you doing today?

Me : Nothing much...enjoying my extended vacation

Random Person : So basically you're doing nothing with your life?

Me: Yup, it's a full time job and I can't take a break from it right now, gotta call you back.

I haven't enjoyed a break this much in as long as I can remember. Not too long and not to short. Just enough time to revamp, and rejuvenate myself for the hard work that I know I have ahead of me in the semester to come. This entire year as I reflect, I feel as though I have had the same type of growth spurt as a 13 year old boy. My voice has changed- Its a lot softer, less angry and a hell of a lot less loud. I've gotten a lot taller as well - I hold my head up a little bit higher and walk with more confidence. I have matured major. He-said-she said and getting the last word are things that I have no use for anymore. And damnit; it feels AMAZING! And I owe it all to this 3 week break where I had nothing to do but enjoy my own company, think and spend some quality time praying; with his help I have put a lot of things into perspective and I feel indestructible, unshakable and lethal to anyone who may try and deter me.

::insert exhale here::